Tuesday, 23 June 2009

Oh well!! We're still learning

So we didn't really have a great weekend. I'd really missed Mr O, because I'm more of a quality time love language person when we don't make time to see I start feeling somehow. I tried to communicate this to him, maybe not in the best of ways. Sometimes in trying to pass a point across, it comes off as being accusatory and so his response really UPSET me big time. God is good, I have learnt to stop reacting to situations but rather respond to them. I kept quiet where on a good day, I could give you double for your trouble!!Lol!

During the course of the weekend I spoke to my mentor (thank God for mentors!!) and she said something that made me see everything in a very different light!! I got a new perspective on how I filter situations through my paradigm and how a lot of times there's a difference between how I feel or think about something and the truth about that something. There is no space for self-centredness in a love story. It's about you, we and us and not me, me, me. I'll be honest, I still posed a bit (I believe this is a lady's prerogative just don't pose too much sha!!).

So we apologised, the situation didn't change, but we changed and we're both happy. In fact, I am very happy, Mr O just called and he's booked me an appointment for a facial at Clarins! Yay! Totally unexpected and out of the blue. I'm learning to understand his own language, oh yes I am!! So in summary what I've learnt is;
  • Always communicate how you feel, sometimes it's better for the words to come out wrong than to say nothing at all
  • Having said that, try your best not to come across as accusatory, use I more than you..I feel, I think e.t.c.
  • Accept the fact that the other person might do something that makes you angry, even very angry but try to respond and not react, don't make a bad situation worse, if you didn't say anything no-one can point at what you said
  • Also accept the fact that sometimes things will not be what you term ideal, remember ideal is a subjective word; your ideal might not be his/her ideal
  • Remember that no matter what happens, you love the person and love covers a multitude of sins

Ok, that's my two cents today. Next update should be what happened in Pastor D's office!


1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Thank God for mentors. Sometimes, the mentee is also a mentor to the mentor lol!